Confidence: A Little Goes A Long Way

ConfidenceI received an email from a client tonight. I read it, smiled and went to delete it. And then I thought: “No. There’s something in this which might be important for all of us.”

Here’s what my client said:  You have given me much confidence. Thank you.

Doesn’t look like much, does it?   So small I almost missed it for a couple of reasons. First off, it’s only eight words and it sounds like a throwaway remark.   It’s always nice to get a thank you, but this isn’t about me. It is about good listening and good noticing but – at the point this arrived in my inbox at 5.30 tonight – it was the 152nd email I had received so far today out of 165 and still counting.

So I could very easily have missed those eight little words and yet, they are telling me something so important about my client. This is a woman who spoke in public to a Government enquiry last week and will be on BBC radio next week. Who could know she feels lacking in confidence?   These eight words tell me what she has to put herself through to do that for the sake of her business and her mission. They tell me how to be with her. How to support her. How she sees herself. Her truth.   And her new-found confidence will continue to increase because she was clever enough to spot it herself, and bring it to my attention.

It just goes to show how a coach has to focus, to listen with laser-like intensity and to love her clients enough, especially when I take confidence for granted to some extent.   And yet I also know the things we go through which can knock our confidence.   But the truthful person that I am would never build up false confidence in a client. I appreciate them for what they are, more golden than they initially appear to themselves.

My client can build on this and that’s very exciting indeed.   For both of us.

photo credit: SweetOnVeg via photopin cc

Confidence:  A Little Goes A Long Way

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6 Responses to “Confidence: A Little Goes A Long Way”

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  1. Mary Waring says:

    Loved the post Judith. It’s so easy to assume that if someone has been successful in their workplace that they must have tons of confidence. But from my own experience I know that being confident doesn’t necessarily come naturally. It’s hard work & something you need to practice all the time. I’ve had a number of people say they don’t know why I attend personal development courses & read so much about gaining confidence. They think I already have it in bucketloads. But the reason I appear to have it is I work hard at it. It’s learnt not something your necessarily born with.
    Mary.

  2. Jan says:

    Lovely post Judith. It reminded me not to make assumptions when I meet others just because they look like they’re brimming with confidence. Or, come to that make assumptions at all. More mindfulness practice – thank you Jan x

  3. Hi Carol, thanks you for visiting me here. We are close neighbours as I am in Streatham Hill. You can go all around the world virtually, it seems, and meet your next-door neighbours! How’s business?

  4. Bless you, JS. It’s a noisy world, that’s the thing, with much competing for our attention. What’s 8 little words? Grateful they landed in my net.

  5. Janet Swift says:

    How pleasing it is that you noticed those few words which bring with them a truck load of meaning and importance. Listening, really listening, is a skill and one you have in abundance. And, let’s face it, you don’t miss much either . . .

  6. Yes, confidence is definitely everything in business and it is always great to have something to build on so your client is very blessed.

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