Yes, but only to the extent that you permit that to happen. Start with awareness. Notice what your partner says and how it affects you, how it makes you feel. Just because they believe X and give importance to that, doesn’t mean you have to. Start by separating finances into joint and several (ours/yours/mine) and do with yours something which improves your own circumstances and relationship with money and attracting abundance.
Ask your partner to stop doing whatever it is that is negatively affecting or sabotaging you. Discuss it out in the open; think of yourselves as joint CEOs of Mr & Mrs Smith PLC. Find out where you do have common ground about money and intend to build on that together.
My experience is that though men in my culture have been brought up historically to take the responsibility for bread-winning on themselves (although many do not as well) and that responsibility weighs heavily upon them like a very heavy burden at times, women are more flexible and better at household budgeting and will do anything to keep the family afloat.
Is it time to re-write the rules around money in your relationship/marriage, or to create some to begin with? Does your partner care about you enough to respect your boundaries and feelings and views around money? Yes = good. No = hard decisions to be made about money -v- your partnership.
Please can you comment on the morality of asking for abundance when we already have so much more than third world countries?
For me it isn’t a question of morality. I don’t want more. I am grateful that I already have more than enough, in the sense that you infer in your question. However, some people find it easier to ask for more knowing that they can use it to help those in need rather than intending it acquire or hoard it greedily or spend it selfishly. And maybe it is easier for us to attract and acquire more resource on their behalf in our first world than it is for others less fortunate. We know there are ways to teach those in the third world to fish rather than just give money to them and dis-empower them. And there are some circumstances where their need is so great that our gifts of cash and food and medicines are their most urgent need right now. That will always cause me to open my wallet.
There is more than enough in the world for everyone to have an abundance. My having more doesn’t mean somebody else has to have less. And as one of my colleagues says “the more I have, the more I can do with it”, meaning the more he can pay it forward and help those you may be concerned about. I do think we want to work out what it takes to get our own needs met and be self-sufficient, while helping those in need as our conscience dictates.
More isn’t better and “more” is very non-specific. How much more is too much in your view? If I were you I would be getting on and being the change I wanted to see in the world rather than, perhaps, judging others and assuming their greed although I agree that greed is prevalent across our world too and some redistribution of wealth is long overdue. I believe some multi-millionaires are even suggesting this themselves now e.g. Warren Buffett wanting to pay more tax.
Rich people aren’t all evil. The reverse is also true, poor people aren’t all good. We must each take responsibility for ourselves and do the best we can to help and serve others.
To what extent do limitations imposed by current health conditions affect mindset around abundance?
I am grateful that I am in perfect health. To what extent do you let the limitations imposed by your current health conditions affect your mindset? I am sure there may be practical implications but do they need to affect your mindset? If so, how could you rise above them?
Does your health only affect your mindset about abundance or does it affect your mindset about anything else/everything else? Assuming not, borrow from the ways where you do not allow it to affect you and apply that to mindset just as efficiently.
Be kind to yourself health-wise and do the best you can and be honest with yourself too. Is it really about your health or are you just no better than the rest of us at finding mental abundance and staying in the zone?
You might find reading Dr Wayne Dyer’s book Wishes Fulfilled very helpful; try affirming “I AM Healed. I AM Perfect Health”. I have had some miraculous results with this myself over the last three weeks; small improvements perhaps, but they’ve led me to remember that anything is possible and to empower the divine spark within.
How to maintain a consistent mindset around abundance despite external influences, people with scarcity mindset & dire situations?
With practice! Stop watching the news on TV, listening to it on the radio, reading it on the internet and in the newspapers. Stay away from it. I’ve done that for decades and I can tell you that the really important stuff still gets through.
My best friend is the most negative person I know and over the years I’ve asked her to stop sending me links to bad news stories from the BBC website. When she starts to bang on and on about bad news I ask her to stop; its just a habit, she in hers, me in mine. As soon as I notice anything which affects how my body feels and I feel myself start to ingest it, I stop the source and/or move away from it.I re-train people about what they may bring into my home, my life, my awareness and my inbox and I drop negative people and energy drains. End of.
It is vital that I keep myself in a positive mindset and upbeat at all times. I am an optimist by nature and now I know how to keep myself strong and in that place. My glass is half full, its a lovely glass and someone will be along in a moment to fill it up. Their negative version of the world is no more true than my positive one is except as we intend and make it so. Choose your friends wisely and ask them to respect your views or shut up!
This is really important, despite my levity. Think of yourself like an athlete in training, you are on a bad news and scarcity diet, i.e. you limit intake of either as close to zero as possible in order for you to win your abundance race.
I am grateful to Sue Okell and her clients at LifeChangeSecrets.com for submitting these questions.