Q32: Who Am I To…?

You are a unique and wonderful human being. I know this because I know you personally, I have been your coach, and you and your lovely husband have been to visit me in my home.

Listen very carefully, I shall say this only once.

If you don’t live your life to the fullest, no-one will give a damn except you, and those that love and respect you like your husband, those beautiful children (once they are old enough), your wonderful friends, and me.

It is your job (and yours alone) to live your own unique life in whatever way that lights your candle, that might be by business achievement/employing yourself for money, or not.

But your light doesn’t dim anyone else’s. Au contraire, Beloved.

Implicit in your question is what will other people think of me.

Who cares? I honestly couldn’t give a hot damn, and neither should you and I almost never tell anyone to should. Can’t bear shoulds, me, but I feel a bit shouldy about this one.

Get on and do whatever you want to do anyway, and let people think whatever they are going to think, which is mostly a lot less than you hallucinate because they are all far too self-obsessed and crippled with the same anxieties.

I am sure you know the very famous quote by Marianne Williamson from her book A Return to Love. I am going to quote it anyway (below) and tell you that when someone first faxed it into my office in the Nineties, I cried. That’s how much it spoke to me. That’s how much I was still connected to the part of me and the time in my life in which I was under-achieving by my own standards, no-one else’s.

Your playing small serves no-one, most especially not you or those gorgeous shiny children of yours. Put this completely misapplied modesty aside and let’s crack on. You are powerful beyond measure. Let us both get on with the business of liberating others if that’s the (accidental) result of living by our own light.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”Marianne Williamson – A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”


Do you know this gorgeous song by Brian Kennedy – Get on With Your Short Life? I share it because it came to mind when I was writing to you.  And what a hunk, eh? You can thank me later for that.

Your Biz Your Way

If you have enjoyed reading my words here, you might also enjoy my book - Your Biz Your Way: Learning to Trust Yourself. Relax! You've Got This. Find out how to buy the book here Read My Book